Tag Archives: success

Telling Great Lies

26 Sunday Apr 2015

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telling great lies

I know that a number of people who come across this title would wonder what I mean by the title. Years ago, I read the book, “Retire Young Retire Rich” by Robert Kiyosaki where came across the concept.

This has to do with the kind of words we say to ourselves. I found out that when one makes a statement such as “I can never have enough money” or “I can never be rich” or “I can never be happy” that these statements are actually lies because they are not based on actual facts. They have not been to the future to confirm that they can never be those things, so basically, they are lying.

This same principle applies to a situation where one makes a statement such as “I will be very rich in future” or “I will pass my exams” or “I will be happily married”. They have also lied.

However, the truth is that anything you say about yourself will eventually become a reality in future. This means that these lies you tell about yourself, if told over a long enough period of time, would eventually come true. This is because those words are planted in your mind and begin to affect your actions and your future is a result of your actions based on the words you have spoken to your mind.

So when one makes a statement such as “I cannot have enough money”, what happens is that the person’s mind picks up the message of poverty and transmits it to the brain and it sits there, such that when an opportunity to make money arises, the mind shuts off itself from this opportunity thus causing the person to remain at that same level of poverty or perceived lack of prosperity.

The same applies to when a person makes a positive statement such as, “I will be very rich”, the person’s mind picks up the message and the brain continues to work out ways for the person to become rich such that when an opportunity to make money arises, the brain immediately picks it up and the person takes advantage of the opportunity.

Taking all these into consideration, I believe that it makes a bit more sense for me to live a great life which has come about through the telling of positive lies I have told in the past about my future than to have a life filled with pain and sadness as a result of negative lies I may have spoken into my future.

I am not saying that telling lies with the intent to deceive is good, but when it comes to our future, we should watch the words we use because our words do become a reality.

Just as Christians believe that the world was created through spoken word, we as humans have this immense power in our spoken word because we are a product of the superior intelligence that created the world.

Telling great lies in practice is very easy and costs very little, if anything. However, its benefits are amazing as it helps to shape our future and keeps us in a great mood.

So my advice is this,  next time you feel down and negative thoughts fill your mind, just watch yourself and spot when those negative lies are about to pop out of your mouth. Stop yourself and consciously choose instead to speak positively.

Make positive speaking a habit and watch your life and your outlook about life change for the better.

Have a fulfilling week ahead.

Chika

The Power of Association

20 Monday Apr 2015

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the power of association

This is a repost from a blog I had about a decade ago. Even though it has been a decade since I originally wrote this, I believe the lessons are still very valid for the times we are in…

Read below;

This topic has been on my mind for a while but no introduction ever seemed to fit. It was not until this morning, I was trying to wipe water that spilled on the floor. I had my bowl of water and my mop, and then my mind did a flash back to a HIV advert I watched on MTV about a year ago. Two young guys were about to go diving. The first guy insisted on going in with their safety gear. His friend said, “No we always go in with it, there are no sharks around. Let’s just go in this once without it.” The guy still argued with his friend a bit but finally his friend convinced him and they both dived in without their safety gear. True to the way life usually works out, they both got eaten by sharks.

It is a fact that those we constantly associate with have the power to either add to us or subtract from us. When we constantly interact with people, before long, we find ourselves beginning to act, speak and think like them.

If your inner circle is made up of people who constantly and without fail, sit around and engage in idle chat and gossip, while arguing about non-issues, before long, you would find yourself doing the same.

On the other hand, If your inner circle is made up of people who are focused, driven and serious minded, you too will have no choice but to be like them.

There have been a number of literature that have been dedicated to explaining the impacts of friendships and associations. The Bible also supports it in Proverbs 13 vs. 20 which states:

He that walketh with wise men shall be wise but a companion of fools shall be destroyed.

I like to believe that there are 5 different kinds of friends. They include, Refreshers, Refiners, Reflectors, Reducers and Rejecters. Below is a brief explanation of each category;

Refreshers: These are friends or acquaintances who strengthen your faith, encourage and energize and motivate you towards achieving your goals and vision. They too have big dreams and share a similar vision with you. When you interact with these people, your energy level goes up and you stay inspired.

Refiners: This group of people clarify your vision. After interacting with a refiner, you leave the room feeling more energised and with a clearer definition of your vision. They are very similar to the refreshers.

Reflectors: This group of people neither add nor subtract from you. They only mirror your energy. You have a great time interacting with them but you do not feel that you have learnt anything new, neither do you feel worse off. Most work colleagues fall into this category.

Reducers: These are people who actively/unconsciously try to diminish your goals and efforts to bring you down to their comfort level. Most of the time, they are people that are too afraid to see beyond their present situation and they get uncomfortable when they see someone with a large vision. You find out that, after interacting with such people for a long period of time, you feel like your energy levels are down. Perhaps you may feel some feeling of dismay after a long period of interacting with these individuals.

Rejecters: These are people who do not understand you or what you are trying to achieve. They keep criticizing everything and do not attempt to understand. After interacting with a rejecter, you may feel a sense of discomfort and lack of peace.

I believe that it is very easy to categorise your friends and acquaintances into the five categories stated above using their word patterns and reactions to concepts and ideas you come up with. It is now your responsibility to consciously decide who you want to keep in your life and who you need to perhaps not have that close association with if you know that they are/may become hindrances to the fulfillment of your dreams and vision.

I hope this has blessed you as much as it has blessed me.

Have a fulfilling week ahead.

Love,

Chika

Standing Still

21 Saturday Mar 2015

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standing-still Fairly recently, l took on a new role which involves a lot of commuting. A number of friends and acquaintances believe that the number of hours I spend on the train is a bit too much and some of them have stated out rightly that they could never see themselves ever doing this for a job. Personally, I am thankful for the experience because I believe I have learnt a lot these past few months. A whole lot I must say. The thing I enjoy most about commuting is that it provides me with time to think while doing a bit of people watching and writing. In this present day when we are constantly bombarded by social media notifications, phone calls, WhatsApp messages, text messages, BBMs and all other forms of modern day distractions, it has become quite a luxury for me to be able to set aside time to just clear my head and ponder about everything from life plans to trivial matters such as what I am going to have for dinner. Actually, scratch that, dinner is not trivial for a self professed foodie like me. Thankfully, this is where the gym comes in…when I can drag myself there. Lol…Pardon me, I digress. Back to my point… Being able to mentally eject oneself from all these distractions is what I refer to as standing still. Standing still for a period of time, be it 10 minutes or up to one hour in my case, i.e. a time when you can just sit, lie, stand, bend or take up any position that pleases you to ponder, allow your mind to wander while visiting/revisiting your goals. You know those goals I am referring to, those ones you have told yourself that you just have not got the time to think about because you have been so busy. You could stand still and think about these alongside everything and anything else. You could decide to reflect on the past, your childhood days or even embarrassing moments (I know I have had my fair share of them). Any wholesome thought goes within this period of standing still. I usually end up feeling a lot more grounded than I would otherwise have felt if I were constantly checking my phone and getting distracted by God knows what else. A greater feeling of control and peace usually engulfs me after my “standing still sessions”. Maybe this is what yoga does. I believe both concepts are the same because they both provide one with some time to eject oneself from modern day distractions. It is okay if you are reading this and thinking, “This is total bonkers”. However my suggestion to you would be, why not try it out and if after a few sessions, if you come to the conclusion that this is not for you, then at least you know one more thing that does not quite work for you. I personally have benefited so much from standing still and I strongly believe that if you actively and consciously practise this, you would be pleased at how much mind work you can get done in this period of sober reflection. Till you read from me again, keep keeping on. Image credit: nicktyrone.com

Happy New Year!!!

04 Saturday Jan 2014

Posted by in Motivation, Quotes

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blue sky

“There is no such thing as a grey day, the sky is always blue. Sometimes there are grey clouds, in front of the blue sky so we say the sky is grey today but never… The sky is always blue” – Marianne Williamson

Hi friends,
This is to remind you that just as the blue skies seem hidden behind the grey clouds, your life is always beautiful and brilliant. All you need to do is open your eyes and heart to see.

Have a fulfilling and blessed 2014

Love,
Chika

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Daring Greatly

29 Sunday Sep 2013

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sweat

Hi friends,
It is another Sunday, the beginning of what would be a fruitful week. I just finished restoring my phone after I did a factory reset that took hours and began the process of preparing myself for a new week.
This process of preparing myself for a new week, usually involves either mentally picturing what I aim to achieve in the week, dreading the week (if it looks like it would be a boring one) or listening to inspiring interviews and messages. While still deciding which it would be, I came across a tweet from Oprah Winfrey (not addressed personally to me of course…hehehe I wish) that referred to Super Soul Sunday and I decided to look up the show on Google.
My search led me to an interview she had earlier this month with Brene Brown, a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work. During the insightful interview (try to watch it if you can), Professor Brown mentioned a quote by Theodore Roosevelt which resonated greatly with me. I will leave you with this quote and I hope it inspires you the way it inspired me.

See quote below;

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” – Theodore Roosevelt

Have a pleasant week ahead

Image credit: bbc.co.uk

View from the other side

24 Tuesday Sep 2013

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view from the other side

Hi friends,
Recently, I have been concentrating more on posting quotes which I have found to be inspirational and not written anything more personal. However, yesterday, a friend of mine referred to a post I made two years ago on an old blog I used to run. I had actually forgotten about this post but her comment caused me to read through it and I was amazed at how much the key message still applies. So I thought to repost here…

I hope this inspires you as it inspired my friend.

See below…

20th October 2011

It has been close to 4 months since I last wrote in my blog. In this period, I have succeeded in completing some crucial coursework, completing my dissertation for my masters program and doing my viva (defence of the dissertation). I have also joined a network marketing program, that has paid off real well (that is gist for another post) and lost some weight.
More important than all these accomplishments are some important life lessons I learnt during this period. One of which I would share with you today.

A number of us are familiar with optical illusions, one of which is in the picture above. This picture is a fusion between a young woman and an old woman. A couple of people see just the young woman wearing a hat with her face away from them while other people just see the face of a really old woman. Whichever category you fall into does not change the fact that both views exist.

Life is exactly like that. Most times we look at a situation from a particular perspective without realising that a different perspective very different from what we see exists. An example that readily comes to mind is a personal experience of mine.

Some months after I arrived into the United Kingdom, I was very desperate for a part time student job that I could combine with my studies, due to the fact that my resources were dwindling at an alarming rate. I kept applying and applying but got the same polite rejections. Finally, I got a call from a company for an interview. I was so delighted and prayed so hard for it to work out. I went for the interview and did very well. I was invited to a trial shift but I was told by the manager that I needed to go for another one, as he was not sure if I was up to the standard. 3 trial shifts after, I was told that I could not be employed for the role. At that point I was already tired and a bit devastated because I had put in a lot of effort and I felt the job was for me. I had no choice but to move on.

Two days later, I got a call from another company that I had applied much earlier in the year. I had actually forgotten about that application because I didn’t get a call when I expected. I was invited to an interview and I was offered the job two days after the interview. I must say, that the job I finally got was a much better one with a slightly better pay package, better working conditions, free outfits etc. I was amazed at how things worked out. I had been so focused on the view of the other job that I did not step back consider other views.

Right now, you may be gunning for something that is causing you a lot of pain because it does not seem to be working out. It may seem to you that you have to be on that path or no other. Have you considered stepping back a bit to think that just maybe, you are not on the right path and that a more rewarding path exists elsewhere if only you decide to adjust your view? It could also be that you are on the right path but you are just wearing the wrong shoes, i.e. using the wrong methods to solve the problem. This life is really not as difficult and complicated as most of us make it out to be.

Every single situation has more than one view to it. We just need to step back a bit and look within for it.
Till you read from me, have a blessed weekend.

Image credit: coolopticalillusions.com

The Journey to Success

18 Thursday Jul 2013

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keep trying

I hope you have had a good month so far. Mine has certainly been interesting. Even more interesting is the fact that summer has fully kicked in here and people have replaced grey dreary looking winter jackets for bright coloured summer outfits. I have even had the pleasure of viewing some bare-chested blokes who find the 20 something degrees Celsius temperature as a bit too much to handle. What can I say? Life is beautiful.

I watch a lot of TV series from Greys Anatomy, Big Bang Theory, to Suits. I can’t seem to get enough. Also, on those nights when I find myself awake, I go on YouTube to watch music videos. Sometimes I even watch really old ones just to reminisce about those days. Last night, after watch The Apprentice Finals, I did the same and somehow I found myself hooked on “Pretty Wings” by Maxwell; there is something about the song that makes me smile…

I digress…

So after what must have been the 20th time, I finally stopped myself from listening to Maxwell and decided to search for a song I used to play while doing my Saturday house chores back in Nigeria. As I settled into bed, my thoughts wandered back to those days when life was just about getting good grades and making my parents proud. As I gradually let myself fall into sleep’s warm embrace, I briefly opened my eyes one last time to look at the computer screen and to my pleasant surprise, I recognised the man playing lead male character in the music video as the same actor who plays a popular and one of my favourite characters on Greys Anatomy. I was surprised mainly because I know the video I was watching was old. I pushed away the covers, moved closer to the laptop screen just to make sure my eyes were not deceiving me, pulled back the progress slider, watched for a while, and there he was again.

Now fully awake and excited, I embarked on the task of watching other videos just on the off chance that I would spot some now famous TV personality and sure enough, I found them. People who we now recognise as famous were once a little more than extras in old music videos. Those must have indeed been the days of humble beginnings.

I marvelled as I pondered about this. Surely anyone looking at how popular these actors are now, and how much they make would not realise that they for many years had to take on relatively irrelevant roles on their road to success. Rather than quit, they carried on doing what they believed in and were eventually rewarded with success and the fame that comes with it.

The truth of the matter is that there are very few successful people who have made success on their first attempts. Most have had to keep trying and trying and even become involved in endeavours that have not quite been at the same level they desired, but never lost sight of the dream until they were finally rewarded with success.

This principle also applies to other industries and various other aspects of life. Sadly, majority of people only recognise successful people only after they have succeeded and automatically want to be identified with that level of success without realising that before the success were many tries and tears, a lot of time had been spent behind the scenes.

Just as a seed doesn’t the instant you put it in the ground, it first has to die and survive the elements of weather before it germinates and eventually becomes a tree, in the same vein, lasting success never comes overnight. You have to try and try again, keeping the dream alive even when your immediate surrounding suggests otherwise.

Let this be a source of encouragement for you, no matter what situation you are currently trying to succeed in, be it a business, landing a better job, a health issue, family issues, losing weight, whatever it is, know this;

Success doesn’t always come at the first try, you just have to keep trying and getting up after every apparent failure. Chances are you could only be one more failure away from the success you dream of.

I hope you have a very pleasant weekend ahead.

Love,
Chika

Image credit: businessinsider.com