Monthly Archives: December 2012

My 2012: reviewed

31 Monday Dec 2012

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2012-2013
It was a not-so bright Sunday afternoon yesterday, the weather was a bit rainy and I was walking home after a 55-minute work-out at the gym. With my JD Sport “gym sack” hanging weightlessly from my right shoulder and my I-pod blasting a mix of work out and solemn music, I trudged on home, the hood of my jacket was my only protection from the “epileptic rain” and my thoughts wandered as I observed pairs of Sunday shoppers and diners walking and holding hands.
I got to the pelican crossing, pressed the signal and waited for the traffic light to stop oncoming traffic so I could cross. While waiting and wondering, the music on my I-pod changed to “Bianule” a song by Samsong (It is a Nigerian gospel praise song performed in a mix of English and Igbo Language). As I listened to the song, I felt my heart flooding with positive thoughts as I reflected on my year 2012.
Flashes of different memorable events flooded my mind: I had my graduation ceremony in January 2012 which saw my parents and friends coming over to see me finish with a Distinction in Information Systems Management. Between February and March, I let go of some friendships and made new friends, I went ice-skating for the first time in March and realised that I was extremely bad at it (I fell too many times to count. It was hilarious and physically painful) Between April and July, I changed jobs twice and moved to a new city as result of the new job. By August, I started a fitness plan, embraced a life of more conscious living and lost a total of 32 pounds (about 15kg) between August and December (I still find it hard to believe, please look out for my blog post on fitness in January 2013 as I will be sharing some fitness tips).
Between August and November, I studied and passed some certification exams and excelled at work. In September, I travelled to the beautiful, serene country of Malta with friends on holiday… and the list continues. My friends and loved ones have not been left out of these testimonies as good health and success stories have been highlights of the year.

As I thought about all these and more, I began to sense a feeling of intense humility as I acknowledged the fact that I would not have achieved this without God for He alone made all these possible. When people praise me, I find it hard to believe and accept because I know that they have not by my power and might. I wouldn’t have achieved any of these if not because of the finger of God in my life. They were surely not because I have deserved them because by some standards, I haven’t. The Creator in his infinite wisdom and love has kept me and mine throughout the year and I will always be thankful for this.

You may be reading this and comparing your 2012 with mine and it may not seem as grand or positively eventful but I urge you not to be dismayed. You are alive and your heart is beating, that is something to be grateful about. You need to realise that in every minute you spend not being thankful, someone has lost his/her life. The constant awareness of this tends to put things in perspective for me whenever negative feelings crop up. You may be comparing yourself with friends who seem to have done better than you in 2012 but you need to realise that we all have different paths and as the saying goes, if you decide to be someone else, then who will be you?

I urge you my friends to replace any feeling of ingratitude or irrational competition with a heart of thanksgiving for the things you have. This is because, the more thankful you are, the more your life becomes a fertile ground for the fulfilment of those things you still desire.

If you have had an even more fruitful 2012, then I rejoice with you and urge you to stay thankful as even greater achievements will come in the new year.

I wish you all a fruitful and fulfilling 2013.

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The key to success

30 Sunday Dec 2012

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Success-Key

“Go on in the certain way, and if you do not receive that thing, you will receive something so much better that you will see that the seeming failure was indeed a great success” – Wallace Wattles

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“ Iron rusts from…

28 Friday Dec 2012

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mind

“ Iron rusts from disuse, stagnant water loses its purity, and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigors of the mind.” — Leonardo da Vinci

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Look Within

21 Friday Dec 2012

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look within2
It is 3 days to Christmas and everyone down here is buzzing with Christmas spirit. Cards are being exchanged, company Christmas parties are well underway, high street stores are filled with shoppers trying to last-minute gifts for their friends and family. Christmas lights and decorations adorn the streets and door posts. It is indeed an exciting time alive and I am so glad that we have made it this far into the year.

Amidst my happiness, I am also aware of the pain that families of the victims of the Sandy Hook Elementary School. The shooting took place on the 14th of December, 2012 in Newtown Connecticut, United States of America, where a 20 year old young man opened gun fire killing his mother at her home, 20 school children and 6 adults before finally killing himself in an act that I can only describe as utterly sick and incomprehensible.

As I sit here pondering while reading through the descriptions of the victims, most of whom were around 6 years of age, it saddens me that these kids were not given the chance to live a full life as we know it. I personally would probably never understand what must have gone through Adam Lanza’s mind to allow him hatch and execute this senseless act on poor unsuspecting victims. One thing I am sure of though is the fact that his name will forever go down in history as the young man who was responsible for the unfair and unjust killings of these beautiful people.

These thoughts have got me pondering on the impression we leave in the hearts of people around us. “If you die today, would you be remembered as that loud, inconsiderate and irascible woman/man who didn’t mind trampling upon people as long as his/her goal was achieved?”, “Would you be remembered as dishonest person, a gossip or perhaps would people have no recollection of you because you have made no clear impact on people’s lives?” “Would people hear about your passing on and heave a sigh of relief?” “Would people only pay lip service to you at your funeral?”

I know all these may sound slightly harsh, but with the end of 2012 drawing ever so near, I believe now is the perfect time to take stock of our lives with the awareness that life on earth as we know it is fleeting. It is indeed the perfect time to make lasting decisions to be the best person we can be from now on. Let us make the decision to quit all unnecessary concerns and competition and decide to look within, bearing in mind that we humans on earth are supposed to be a reflection of God’s kindness and love.

Let this thought consume and shape our responses to events and our behaviour towards each other. Let us ask ourselves how we would feel if we were on the receiving end of our words, actions and inactions. Let this awareness shape the way we think about ourselves and the people around us.

I believe that a constant awareness of this would help us shape how we conduct ourselves from now on, into 2013 and beyond.

I wish you a happy and fulfilling Christmas celebration.

Love,
Chika

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Do not lose your head

12 Wednesday Dec 2012

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Don't lose your head

This topic is very dear to my heart as I have seen it happen over and over again, spoken to people about it and had slight difference of opinions, yet it still remains true.

To ilustrate this properly, I will start with something that actually happened to me.

Tuesday was a very busy day at the office. I spent almost all day running from one meeting to the other and as a result, I developed a slight headache. Knowing that I had two more meetings to attend before close of business, I decided to go into Boots pharmacy to get myself some packs of Paraceutamol. I had 10 minutes to get there, buy the drugs and get back to my meeting. On arriving at the pharmacy, I tried to find the Paraceutamol on the shelves but to no avail.

At some point, I remembered seeing them at the counter close to the cashier. So, I walked straight there, picked up two packs for good measure and gave the cashier a 10 pound note. She had an impassive face which I concluded was just her nature. I looked at her name badge and continued waiting for my change. To my surprise, she almost tossed the coins at me, this led to some coins falling out and she did not offer any apology for her behaviour. I looked at her and saw her arranging some imaginary change.

Knowing Boots customer service level as superb, i felt that she was very wrong. Surely, I had not treated like a valued customer. I had three options at that point, 1) Leave the fallen coins right where she dropped them and walk away to register my annoyance. 2) Report her to her supervisor for not treating me as a valued customer. 3) Walk away.
I took one last look at her and saw that she was still counting her imaginary change with her head was still bowed, I picked up my change and walked away.

As I walked out of the Pharmacy, several thoughts crossed my mind. “Was she racist?”, “Could I have reported her to her supervisor?”, “Could I have told her off?” and so on. As these thoughts kept going through my head, I found myself getting upset and even angry. My day started getting gloomier and the headache started getting worse. “How could she almost toss my change at me and not apologise?” I thought.

It was at that point I stopped my thoughts and reasoned, “What if she is having a really bad day?”, “What if her boyfriend/husband annoyed her”, “Do you know what else she may be dealing with?” and most importantly, “Do you want to get yourself worked up over because of someone who is clearly unhappy and ruin your day as a result?”.

As these new thoughts passed through my mind, I found myself getting calmer and even happier. Then I remembered something my Dad told me years ago whenever I overreacted, “Chikamso, do not lose your head”. At this point, I noticed that my mood had changed from being upset to very amused. I looked at my wristwatch, saw I had 5 minutes to my meeting and hurried along.

Almost every day we start our days very happy and jolly but encounter people who treat us in a manner that should upset us. Most times we let ourselves get annoyed, react and even overreact. The result of this overreaction is that our day becomes effectively ruined.
This is because; you may start to feel bad for your overreaction or even worse for not reacting at all.

What has happened is that you have let someone else’s bad day to affect and influence your day. Perhaps if you could step back when you feel those angry thoughts forming, identify the source of these thoughts and consciously decide to have a good day regardless.

Perhaps if you could learn to bite your tongue for 10 seconds before reacting and think about why the other person must have acted in the manner he/she did.

Perhaps you would think a bit more clearly and continue to have a good day regardless of however anyone else has acted towards you.The peace that comes from knowing and doing this is so amazing. Try it, it works.

Have a great week and weekend ahead

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